GAME REVIEWS

Scored out of ten. We buy our own copies, we finish the games, and we've never once let a preview-event buffet change a number. 468 reviews and counting — the newest are below, the archive smells faintly of toner.

PLATFORM:
GENRE:
HADES II9/10

REVIEW Roguelike · PC

Hades II — Melinoë earns the family name

Supergiant's sequel deepens every system that mattered and cuts the ones that didn't. Night after night, it holds.

ASTRO
BOT
9/10

REVIEW Platformer · PS5

Astro Bot — pure joy, no asterisks

Team Asobi built the friendliest platformer of the generation. Cynics tested; cynics converted.

NINE
SOLS
8/10

REVIEW Action-platformer · PC / Switch / PS5

Nine Sols — taopunk deflection perfection

Red Candle's 2D parry-em-up borrows Sekiro's rhythm and finds its own furious voice.

HOW WE SCORE no decimals. we're not cowards.

10 — an instant classic. 8–9 — buy it, cancel your weekend. 6–7 — good, with caveats we'll spell out. 4–5 — wait for patches or a price drop. 1–3 — we suffered so you don't have to. No decimals, no "review in progress" limbo, and the score never moves after publication — corrections get their own printed apology.